the world doesn’t stop revolving just cost you are busy… but every single one of us has a little power to stop our own little social life from proceeding.. everyone has a choice it’s really up to individual preference which is more important.

and preferences change with the environment.. think if the boy didn’t meet me, he wouldn’t be the person he has become today… a person i both like and dislike.. i’d rather prefer the old boy happy, goofy and laidback with not a care in the world but being happy with his loved one..

i got an epiphany yesterday.. i never really understood how he could be so busy until he couldn’t contact me at all.. not even 1 short sms.. now we can go for days without hearing from each other. i no longer have the energy to pressurize him and i also don’t wish to do that anymore. so yesterday while i was lying in bed gettin ready to sleep, it suddenly dawned on me that everytime a client comes to town, he becomes the host who has to bring them around 24/7. on top of that, he has his own paperwork to deal with, the shipyard to oversee, and his family commitments. he is just an ordinary man with so much expected of him. its no wonder he’s feeling the strain weighing him down.

honestly if i were him, i don’t think i’d want to bother myself with anything else cos my hands are already so full. any free time i have would be put toward the sleeping hours fund..

seeing things in this light makes me more able to deal with the loneliness. it gives me strength to support him silently and not add to his troubles by whining and complaining about being neglected.

we love each other and we will pull through. amen.